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Hold Me While the World Burns

by Matti Joy

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  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    An album about queer love and grief.

    Bonus Tracks:

    Anything (cover)
    Tonight
    Oh Yeah
    No Hand Me Down Emotional Manipulation
    How Proud Were Your Years?
    I Bet You Would've Called the Cops on Jesus (Bonus Track Version)
    Walk Sublime
    Think Thus Of This Fleeting World
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1.
Next to Me 02:10
I love the way my nails go clack clack clack On the keyboard and smoothly down your back There's nothing that I love more than feeling you Over and under but mostly just right here Next to me I love the way your smile just cuts a seam Through the cloudy clouds that cloud my dreams Even there I feel you Over and under and when I wake I know you're right there Next to me
2.
I've been thinkin about you and me And I'm flabbergasted How'd you find where I was hiding I thought all my luck was spent on being born A white American Something Yet here we are, turning a corner Falling face first into every best year of our lives so far And I'm gobsmacked, gonna need a mop My jaw is melting through the cracks in the floor Nevermind, it's probably good for the blanketflowers Feeding the bees and the birds But where the hell did you come from? And how'd you get my name?
3.
4.
Skin 01:59
Like ripples in the water Or sparks through a filament There's something in my shoe I've only just noticed When you touched my skin I remembered I had it Before there was nothing Between me and the world But then you reminded me Of where I am sitting And how I'm something worth touching Something worth holding Here by this fire When you touched my skin I remembered I had it
5.
You consigned yourselves to a hell of your own makin' Makin' idols of assimilation About what it means to love But god never said that And Jesus would never say that So I guess you shouldn't either I think the friends that I've lost And the tears that I shed for them Watered flowers at my feet I'd rather be standing in dirt though I'd rather be burnin' my toes with 'em on the asphalt Than cooling my heels someday with them in the clouds Go FUCK yourselves! No... Go love yourselves... Because God didn't say that And Jesus would never say that So I guess I shouldn't either
6.
I am compost in training Dust or dirt if it's raining And as the rot draws near You'll find mushrooms in my ears Cause I am compost in training And my sticky tears have torn me asunder Worms will crawl up and hug me under And as I pass through the roots My flesh will become shoots Cause my sticky tears have torn me asunder Let the letters fall from my skin Ink degrades and will free me from its sin Never saw it that way But it'll all be the same So let the letters fall from my skin Rust will flake away the iron in me As the oxygen destroys my boundary And I never chose it myself So I'll take receipts back to hell And let the rust flake away the iron in me Cause I am compost in training Yea I am compost in training
7.
Lay me somewhere green my skin a gleaming just like momma made me Cover my grave with an apricot tree, then leave me be Cause I'll be on the other side A waaaaailin' Like I'm known to do Wailin' On the wind ya might hear my tune I'll be wailin Quiet melodies Wailing Wailin' in the breeze If I go first won't you visit me and tend the green that keeps me resting Nurture your love like a sycamore tree and never leave Or I'll be on the other side A waaaaailin' Like I'm known to do Wailin' Hope the wind will carry my tune I'll be wailin Quiet melodies Wailing Wailin' in the breeze
8.
Hell 02:18
I've never seen Such an awful scene it's hell Comin' out the seams And it's just as well cause it's Hell Knowing you Hell Missing you Hell Loving you Loving you is hell Blood on your hands It was yours but you passed it down Now I'm stuck in shifting sands Outside this border town and it's Hell Knowing you Hell Missing you Hell Loving you Loving you is hell
9.
Unbound 04:57
Hundreds if not thousands of miles overground With a child on her back Fleeing from the press gangs way back home Over sand, stone, jungle and the harshest land Long stolen from her people Toward something that might just look like hope Yet in the final stretch to freedom The fed said leave them to their deaths No mercy for the foreign breath But no barbs upon wire or small petty fine Would keep them from the free exercise Of a timeless love Unbound They were unbound (No state could stop them) Unbound (No man could judge them) Unbound No thing to do but join them and be unbound When commanded to offer up the names Of neighbor, kin, and countrymen They nodded and sent them on along But little did those nazis know Of the long and winding undertow Below the waves that sent them on their way Be it stamps or children feverishly Filled out and smuggled through the leaves It was a treasure of humanity Unbound They were unbound (No state could stop them) Unbound (No man could judge them) Unbound No thing to do but join them and be unbound May this little song and my paltry words Unhinge your heart and sheath your swords And be the death of border wars May your love be unbound
10.
If I had a pistol I could join a revolution Just like Che, imagine me Hunkered down low in the sugarcane Watching Havana burning They might say listen here We got no soap and we got no beer We fight for the Truth and the Truth is clear I say, who you gotta know to get a gun around here? I wanna see Havana burning And if you'd let me join in me and Che Would be the best of friends, we'd wait for the day Someone to say, put on your camouflage vest And your black beret and let's go watch Havana burning If I had a pistol I could join a revolution Just like Che, imagine me Hunkered down low in the sugarcane Watching Havana burning
11.
Where I been and where I'm going are just Two different things And I used to wonder what tomorrow would bring But I don't worry anymore And it ain't Jesus and it ain't the drugs Though they help some folks when the goins' rough And it ain't naps and it ain't the carbs It's just the way I know my heart! Looking back through those lenses Tinted with roses and ashes Never thought I'd see the the sunrise of my life Never thought I'd bask in the rays of love But I've arrived! And it ain't Jesus and it ain't the drugs Though they help some folks when the goins' rough And it ain't naps and it ain't the carbs It's just the way I know my heart! Where I been and where I'm going are just Two different things
12.
There's a corner of your heart for me There's a corner of your heart just for me I will pack my bags just to stay in the corner of your heart Just to stay in the corner of your heart There is room beneath your bed for me There is room beneath your bed just for me I will leave this town just to sleep underneath your bed Just to sleep underneath your bed There's one minute of your day There's one minute of your day There's one minute of your day I will leave this man just to occupy one minute of your day Just to occupy one minute of your day Just to sleep underneath your bed Just to stay in the corner of you heart
13.
I don't want to leave a mess when I go So I'll just let the sun set on its own Let the leaves fall so slow Let the logs to loam Cause my greying will make such a pretty picture This I swear, this I know So won't you hold me while the world burns? There's enough here to keep us warm Won't you hold me while the world burns? There's enough here to keep us warm
14.
When the world goes to break my heart You whisk it away, you whisk it away When the world goes to kill my love You whisk it away, you whisk it away
15.
16.

credits

released May 13, 2022

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Matti Joy Bend, Oregon

Semi-Pro Gardener and Recording Artist due to COVID19

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